But not the reality of right here, of right now.
As Mr. Steady and I celebrated our nineteenth anniversary we spent part of our day talking about very weighty matters.
And such matters weigh on my mind and I find when I have a free moment (which isn't much right now), I find when I sit to write the words are stilled by the circumstances. My words are stuck.
Yet, I don't want you to think I've left, because the reality is I and my family would greatly covet your prayers right now.
Today the family signed up with Hospice for end of life care for Mr. Steady's dad. The news from the doctor yesterday wasn't shocking for us, just a reassurance that it was time to make the step in this direction. The doctor said we aren't looking at more than a few weeks remaining. We are okay. Dad is coherent and is aware that he is in his last days. He says he is grateful for every day God gives him and yet is "ready to go when He sees fit to take me." [exact quote] Family and friends are visiting daily which Dad is really enjoying. We talk and share and laugh and it's good. Real good.
We are in the gloaming now. It's a somewhat quiet waiting place. I've been here before with other loved ones but never for a parent. This is yet another defining moment in my marriage, another layer of what it means to be a help meet. Mr. Steady remains exactly that, steady. God has really truly wrapped his arms around us and is holding us in the palm of His hand.
So, dear readers, I am unsure of my posting schedule in these days. And I ask that should me and mine come to mind... say a prayer for us, that God would continue to hold us and guide us through this time.
I am so deeply thankful for a God that daily meets me right where I'm at, loves me completely and showers me with His great grace and infinite mercy.