The snow’s falling and my mind’s racing ahead with all of the things that need to be done and there’s still the pots and pans soaking and the laundry to be switched over and learning plans to be sketched out for the new year and how many emails that should have been responded to last week because there are real people that I really care about at the end of those notes and I have to get to the post office today and the calendar squares are fattening a year that isn’t even born yet and I am only a little bit terrified of how to live.“Oh,” my heart says.
The snow’s so quiet, coming straight down… knowing where it’s going. I’m wiping off the table. It strikes me: I am not here. My mind’s lunging ahead, already dashing onto the next and the next and the next, tripping over this and that and falling all over the future that isn’t.
I profane this moment when I won’t stay in it.
I get this…. I live this….
Each day I struggle too with not getting ahead of myself….
Struggle with learning to stay in the moment.
I find you miss the best parts of the moments when you are too busy racing on to the next one….
These are the words my heart spoke last nite as I sat in the moment with my family and the moment simply and completely enveloped me.
It was like watching time tick…. my heart felt near to bursting as I was swamped with the thoughts and feelings of how completely and utterly blessed I am.
Indeed I am.
The blessings come in the midst of the moments…. Those crazy, life-living moments….
Doing schoolIt’s all in the moments.
Eating picnic lunches
Watching the kiddos quiz
Going to church
And so on and so forth….
Naming our year…. This I have done.
Last year was the Year of Abiding.
And I learned to abide in the moments.
The good moments
The painful moments
The special moments
The hurtful moments
The dazzling moments
The sorrowful moments
The pleasant moments
The crazy moments
And I learned in abiding that there is contentment in abiding in the moments….
Being all here.
And so 2010 was about learning to abide…. To be…
Not just joy but Fresh Joy….
Fresh joy that comes from being right there in the midst of the moments and experiencing it all
Good and bad
Awe inspiring and awful
Glorious and painful
Overwhelming and underwhelming
Contented and chaotic
…. Joy- real, fresh joy can be found even in the difficult painful moments of this life.
I do believe this is the hint to the focus I need to have for this coming year....
That’s what 2011 is going to be
The Year of Fresh Joy
Weeping may last through the night,
but JOY comes with the morning.
~ Psalm 30:5b
But as for me, I will sing about your power.
Each morning I will sing with JOY
about your unfailing love.
For you have been my refuge,
a place of safety when I am in distress.
~ Psalm 59:16